Let me share a story from one of my clients. It begins: Once upon a time...
Millie was hearing voices in her head. (Actually, we all do!) These voices, or inner selves, came to her from a long time ago. They worked hard to keep her safe and protected as she was growing up.
But some of these voices took their role of protection so seriously that their messages went awry. They chattered quite loudly and drained Millie's energy in the worst way, convincing her to feel guilty and to achieve perfection at all cost. As their influence escalated, she heard more voices like not good enough and stay busy. With such a web of judgmental voices woven within her thoughts, Millie tended to second guess herself. This made her feel uncertain about making decisions and increased her stress and anxiety.
Luckily there were other voices that countered the naysayers, like confident and stay calm. Millie heard them faintly and periodically, but didn't quite own them, so they remained hidden in the shadows.
Does this sound familiar? We are all influenced by a unique range of inner selves. They come over our lifetimes to serve and protect us for a variety of reasons. Although these reasons shift as we mature, we continue to default to their messages. Because they sabotage our decision making, we feel unbalanced and uncertain. How does Millie's story end?
Voice Dialogue
I have been working with Millie, (as well as other clients), using the Voice Dialogue technique. The process gives Millie the chance to acknowledge and understand her voices better. Millie has even spoken as those voices directly. With increased awareness, she is beginning to interact with the voices differently. Here is where the plant with voices comes in.
Millie texted me a picture of this plant with the following words: "Whenever I look at this plant, I think of you. It has different shaped leaves which makes me think of all the different voices I have and now recognize thanks to you. I am now very aware that my perfectionism and guilt are the causes of so much of my anxiety and stress. I can't always stop their voices, but I can try and temper them thanks to all your help."
While this is a happy ending, it is not without continuing work. Millie's increasing awareness of her primary, sabotaging voices allows her to temper their influences without automatically defaulting to them. She is cultivating a harmonious, inner relationship that includes her hidden, disowned voices. Millie is now able to feel more in tune with her selves. Her objectivity has grown and so has her ability to make balanced decisions.
Are you, or someone you know, feeling stuck, or unclear? There are always options. As a Certified Life Coach, I provide a range of creative solutions to access those options so you can move forward with deeper clarity, balance, and purpose.
You can creatively choose your best life one step at a time!
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